Fear is not my Future

Chimnwendum
4 min readAug 26, 2024

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God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore will not we fear, though the earth be removed, and though the mountains be carried into the midst of the sea.

Photo by Sammie Chaffin on Unsplash

I have been experiencing a lot of anxiety bouts lately because of a life-changing decision I made.

While the decision itself gives me peace. The perceived consequences of that decision just make me anxious.

I have weighed and reweighed the cons and pros. The cons are behind by a mile. Yet, I am still anxious.

On the 21st of August, I was listening to gospel music and just said ‘God, I want to rant’ Then, I went in. It was a short and straight-to-the-point rant. I felt good but I knew it was just as effective as a pain relief is to a wounded person.

I went to work and bombarded my boss with questions.
Did you feel this way when you made so so and so decision?
Do you think you are surviving or thriving?
Are you scared Sir?

He simply said:

Anita I don’t know what you are talking about but here is what I will tell you, the greatest form of faith is when you are an entrepreneur. You don’t have a steady income and yet you expect to do so when you put in the work

He continued,

…did God not say that the birds don’t have to worry for food? So if they don’t worry, why should you? Anita, trust God.

As he was speaking, I was nodding. But how do I trust God though? How?

I trust God because…

I trust God.

While writing this, a scripture came to mind. Numbers 23:19

God is not a man, so he does not lie. He is not human, so he does not change his mind. Has he ever spoken and failed to act? Has he ever promised and not carried it through? (New Living Translation)

I love how my spirit man brings to my consciousness scriptures that speak to every situation I am in. Thank you, Lord.

How do I trust God?
1. By studying the scripture
2. By reminding myself of his words over my life. Continuously. The devil will try to mock me into believing I can help God or that God is a liar. I will not listen to him.
3. By being consistent. The work I have been called to do won’t stop because I feel anxious. This is a critical point. I’ll keep going.
4. Pray. Pray. Pray
5. By eating well and ensuring I stay hydrated. (Yes, this is also important).

If you feel the same way I feel, remember, the attack is not against you, but against your divine assignment. Because you are the manager, the devil is interested in you. Will you let him win? NO.

It took me a while to understand this scripture 2 Corinthians 10:4.

For the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh but have divine power to destroy strongholds. ( New King James Version). However, I like the New Living Translation better…
We use God’s mighty weapons, not worldly weapons, to knock down the strongholds of human reasoning and to destroy false arguments.

Most times, the devil attacks the mind because as a man thinks so is he. Not what a man says, what he thinks. You can confess the word verbally but if you don’t believe it, you are pouring water on stone. The two work hand in hand; belief and words.

So whenever those thoughts rise inside of you. Thoughts of doubts, anxiety, and uncertainty, you fight with the Word of God. You remind your consciousness and the devil whose child you are.

You are a royal priesthood and a chosen generation. You have been called to the nations. Do you know that in you all families of the earth shall be blessed? You will stand before kings and not men of low rank. The Word says that wherever the soles of your feet touch, he has given you for your inheritance!

Read the word. Allow yourself to marinate in it. You have got this. And if ever you feel weak and tired, call on the Holy Spirit. He answers.

A year ago, I would have sworn that the Holy Spirit was just the figment of the imagination of some Christian fanatics. But he is real. He answers when you call. If you doubt me, call him now. Ask him to come into your space. Tell him you are waiting, ask him to come, then wait, wait because he is a gentle spirit, he will come.

Father, I thank you for this gift. I bless your Holy Name for the gift of salvation and your Son, Jesus Christ. Thank you because you are not a man. Thank you, sweet Holy Spirit. Thank you, Father.

Ngwanu, it’s another day to shine. Anyi apuo!

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Chimnwendum
Chimnwendum

Written by Chimnwendum

Sharing lessons from stuff adulthood throws at me.

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