On being burnt out at work
Burnout occurs when your body and mind can no longer keep up with the tasks you demand of them. Don’t try to force yourself to do the impossible.
It’s a beautiful Monday morning, and I overslept by 1 hour 8 minutes. Trying to beat traffic after waking up by 6:08 felt impossible. I even forgot I was supposed to have time with God; that was how I jumped into the bathroom and quickly had my bath.
Once I was out, I remembered my uniform was rumpled from the day before, and my outfit needed a little heat. So I quickly went into flash mode, and in exactly 5 minutes, I was done ironing.
Now, the time is 6:35 am, and I am headed for the bus stop. I had to borrow #500 from an aunt because I miscalculated my transport fare the day before. I figured, if i could make it to half the journey, I will get a POS attendant and sort myself out.
I brought biscuits and beverages from home, which were meant for brunch, because the account was not accounting at the moment.
The moment I got to work, something changed. I immediately hated being on the hospital premises. Everything and everyone was irritating me, and I wanted to go home ASAP.
I thought to myself, It is just 8 hours, I can handle it. It wasn't until I was told to man the emergency unit (alone) that my perfect castle came crumbling down.
On a good day, I don’t mind working in the emergency unit because there is so much to learn, and I enjoy the adrenaline rush, but today is not a good day.
I saw myself go from being compassionate to being numb. I didn’t care that a patient was marasmic, and in shock, I felt no ounce of compassion. And weirdly, I liked it.
Normally, when patients or their relatives ask me a question, I would answer with a reassuring smile, but not today. Today, without even looking at the asker, I would point at the security personnel and, with a stern voice, say, ‘Please direct all your questions to the security personnel.’ And they did. I dared them not to.
This continued for 5 hours, and I felt my compassion returning. Although in small doses, it was returning. My colleagues were worried because Nurse Opara wasn’t like this.
Nurse Opara is always smiling and full of energy. The one is always willing to help. She goes out of her way to ensure patients and colleagues are well. In response, I started doubting if I really wanted to be a nurse. Because a nurse shouldn’t be this insensitive, I was unapologetic about it.
I reached out to a senior colleague to be sure this was normal, and it turned out it was. I also took a personality test, which helped me understand myself better and identify the problem. It is funny how the subconscious can affect the conscious.
So, to avoid this from happening again or often, I identified these solutions:
1. Eat well. Food makes me happy, good food makes me happier.
2. Surround myself with great people.
3. Say No more often.
4. Allow people to fight their own battles, I am not their El shaddai.
5. Sleep well.
6. Ignore people and practice selective ignorance.
Question: Have you ever experienced burnout at work? How did you handle it?
